There is always that one person you will risk it all for. Not ALL, but you know what I mean. This is the person that changes things for you. The person who sparks this stupid confidence in you. Confidence you didn’t even know you had. So what did you do? You decided to shoot your shot. You had the ball. You knew when to shoot. In the back of your mind though, something told you to not embarrass yourself. But, you did not let that stop you.

So, you shoot the ball. And you miss.

During the summer, I met a few people who I was attracted to. When it came to shooting my shot, my confidence always fluctuated. For example, when I was an undergrad, I met this guy at an event. He was dark-skinned and a little tall. I think I was 19 when this happened, but I remember telling my friends that I was attracted to this guy. I was staring at him like the creep I was. I thought I was looking at him in a flirty manner. Of course, he noticed. Two of my guy friends at the time decided to walk me to him so I could shoot my shot. We walked over to him and I started a small conversation with him. He had a friend with him who knew what I was up to.

Knowing that the conversation went well, I asked the guy for his number. He gave it to me, which surprised me. Mind you, I was feeling good. In my head, I was like, “YES SHAWTY WE DID IT.” But we really didn’t do shit. I literally walked away like this:

Yes, I shot my shot, but I failed. I failed because he wasn’t really interested. I texted him the next day and I KNEW he wasn’t interested. So I moved on. Now, during this summer, a few people caught my eye. I’m getting older and I didn’t want to be scared of shooting my shot. Rejection happens. We know this.

The first person I shot my shot with automatically friend zoned me. No, I’m not embarrassed by it. I was actually glad they did that instead of leading me into something nonexistent. The second person was my risk. Unlike the first person, I actually told the second person, I liked him. I honestly did not care about how he was going to respond, I just wanted him to know that I liked him. I was testing things out. After I told him, he seemed surprised that I liked him. To the point where he asked why I liked him. I wasn’t phased by this at first. So, I tell him why I liked him. He thanks me and changes the topic. At that point, I was like what the fuck:

After that encounter, I told myself to take a break. I knew that if I shot my shot with another person, I was just going to continue to embarrass myself. Of course, I was shooting my shot with the wrong guys. I wasn’t looking at the ones who were actually interested in me.

If you like someone, there is nothing wrong with telling the person. You may be scared of the reaction, but at least you tried. I recommend waiting for cues to see if the other person is feeling the same way. I’m not an expert, but I just wanted to share my experience and what I have learned. If you don’t go for it, you will never know if they like you or not. You don’t have to be bold and straight up tell the person you like them. You can do things for them, giving them clues, but only if you have that patience and time.

Does this mean I am going to give up? Hell no. But I am taking a break. For those who want to shoot their shot and need a sign, THIS IS YOUR SIGN. Go for it and thank me later. If you miss, do not come for me. For my next shot, I will make it (we speaking it into existence).

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Written by Diaka Thiam

Thank you for reading! 🙂